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Newsflash: Vampires Not Real!
News by vuzman

University of Central Florida theoretical physics professor Costas Efthimiou and graduate student Sohang Gandhi proved that certain behavior attributed to vampires is impossible.

Their paper “Ghosts, Vampires and Zombies: Cinema Fiction vs. Physics Reality,” they explore vampires' behavior as portrayed in movies.

Take Blade. In the 1998 vampire flick, the fanged night-dwellers feed on the blood of humans, who, once bitten, turn into vampires themselves. Impossible, say the scientists - and they use a basic math principle, geometric progression, to prove it.

--

But the joke is on them. Blade is just a movie and in real life feeding doesn't create progeny...

http://www.forbes.com/digitalentertainment/2006/10/30/science-ghosts-vampires-tech_media_cx_ee_1031papers.html

Comments
Grizlas on November 14 2006 09:40:01
That's right. The vampire movies are actually just decoys to provide us with plausible dineiability. You'll be dinner if you tell anyone.
Jogvanth on November 16 2006 11:40:23
"The Masquerade works in mysterious ways"
Grizlas on November 16 2006 13:08:17
oh boy did I rape that word...Deniability...its not that hard
Grizlas on November 24 2006 08:19:23
"..theoretical physics professor Costas Efthimiou and graduate student Sohang Gandhi.."

Sometimes it must get pretty boring down there at the physics lab in florida. They apparently decided that musing about elemental particles and string theory somehow wasn't interesting enough, so why not just forget about all that and focus on something of real value: Refuting abilities of supernatural creatures.

Apparently, the physics department is branching out into xenobiology. Next week these two will host a lecture that they have decided to call: Vulcan Evolution: Pointy ears in microgravity.
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Obituaries
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Spiff
26/01/2026 16:24
Premier league bannari smiley

Grizlas
05/09/2025 14:40
RIP Giorgio Armani!

OKJones
04/09/2025 16:17
Obituaries LOL! smiley

Grizlas
25/08/2025 11:40
Southpark s27e03 is worth checking out - hilarious

Grizlas
14/08/2025 07:48
this one is also pretty slick

Grizlas
07/08/2025 16:52
Agreed

OKJones
07/08/2025 14:24
This banner is the best so far

Grizlas
25/07/2025 07:25
works with no issues in normal version of Firefox. I'm guessing you either did not do CTRL+F5 or are using some adblock plugin.

Norlander
25/07/2025 04:52
Use Firefox and it blocks all sorts of unwanted stuff of course.

Grizlas
24/07/2025 14:57
Using some ad-blocker? Try ctrl+F5